Spiritual Habits

Approaching spiritual practice for the purpose of restful relationship, rather than religious burden.

At the start of a new year, many of us turn our attention to habits. Research shows that somewhere between 40–50% of our daily actions are habitual. Some of these habits are healthy, while others are not, but all of them shape our lives in profound ways.

As we step into this new year, I’ve been reflecting a lot on spiritual habits. Just like we have eating habits, exercise habits, and financial habits, we all have patterns of thought, feeling, and behavior that shape our relationship with God. The question isn’t whether we have spiritual habits; it’s whether those habits are trending toward health and fruitfulness.

But before we dive into the specifics of spiritual habits, we need to start with a foundational truth:

Even the right practice is poisoned when performed for the wrong purpose.

Spiritual habits aren’t meant to be religious burdens. They’re pathways to restful relationship with God. To understand this, consider one of Jesus’ most important invitations in Matthew 11:28–30:

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Here, Jesus invites us to a radically different approach to spiritual habits. Let’s explore three key insights from this passage.

1. Jesus Invites Relationship

Jesus begins with a simple but surprising invitation: “Come to me.”

For anyone familiar with almost any expression of religion, this should be shocking. We’d expect Jesus, as a rabbi, to point to a system, ritual, or checklist. But He doesn’t. Instead, He points to Himself.

The lesson here is clear: Jesus intends everything—including our spiritual habits—to be relational, not transactional.

The goal of spiritual habits isn’t to prove our piety or force God’s favor; it’s to deepen our relationship with Him. And this intention matters deeply.

A few months ago, my wife, Tami, and I went out for sushi. Like any married couple with kids, it’s important for us to prioritize time together—otherwise, life gets busy, and you risk becoming little more than roommates. While we were enjoying our meal, I noticed the couple at the table next to us. They were clearly on a date, just like we were. The tragic part was, both of them spent the entire meal staring at their phones. I’m not exaggerating when I say they never spoke a word to each other.

It struck me how easy it is to go through the motions of being “together” without actually connecting.

The same is true of our spiritual habits. If we’re not careful, they can become mindless routines instead of meaningful practices.

Reflection: Ask yourself, “Why do I want to form spiritual habits?” Is it to check a box? To ease guilt? Or is it to experience a deeper relationship with Jesus?

2. Jesus Welcomes the Worn Out

Notice who Jesus invites: “Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened.”

Jesus recognizes the deep soul-weariness caused by living in a broken world and by misunderstanding God’s purpose for spiritual practice. The Pharisees of Jesus’ day had turned following God into an exhausting list of rules, leaving people spiritually drained.

This is an experience many of us are familiar with. We all know what it is to feel soul-weary.

The problem is, sometimes, we think we need to “get it together” before we come to God. We believe our weariness disqualifies us. But what if weariness is the very condition that allows us to experience Jesus most deeply?

How we respond to God in our seasons of weariness has everything to do with how we view Him.

Sometimes we see God like a drill sergeant driving us forward, screaming an endless list of demands at us, and pointing out our every flaw. Instead, think of an exhausted marathon runner collapsing at the finish line, only to have a friend catch them and carry them to rest. Jesus is that friend. He meets us at the end of our strength and offers us what we were never meant to achieve on our own.

Reflection: If you feel spiritually or emotionally drained right now, don’t wait until you feel “ready” to come to Jesus. He welcomes you exactly as you are. And your weariness is the perfect place to meet Him.

3. Jesus Promises Soul-Rest

Twice in this passage, Jesus promises rest: “I will give you rest… you will find rest for your souls.”

This isn’t just physical rest—it’s the deep, soul-refreshing rest we all crave. It’s the settledness of knowing we are securely connected to the God who created us for relationship with Him.

The problem is, we’re all prone to run to sources that aren’t capable of providing the rest, refreshing, and recharging our souls so desperately needed.

Have you ever tried to charge an Apple device with the wrong charger? With every new iPhone or laptop, it feels like they change the charger type. Trying to plug the wrong cable into your device doesn’t work. Similarly, we often look to the wrong “chargers” for our souls—work, entertainment, food, or relationships. But these things can’t provide the rest we need.

As St. Augustine famously wrote:

“You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You.”

Reflection: Are you running to sources that can’t provide the rest you need? What might it look like to bring your restlessness to Jesus instead?

The Purpose of Spiritual Habits

Spiritual habits are meant for restful relationship, not religious burden.

If your spiritual life feels like a source of pride, shame, or frustration, it might be time to reexamine your habits and realign them with God’s purpose.

A Simple Challenge

This week, I want to invite you to a simple challenge:

Carve out five minutes every day to be with God in a way you enjoy.

Make this time easy and life-giving:

• Sit in silence.

• Take a short walk and talk to God about your day.

• Slowly read a small passage of Scripture.

• Journal a short prayer.

The goal is to create space for restful connection, not to check a box. By keeping it simple and enjoyable, you’ll end the day thinking, “I can’t wait to do that again tomorrow.”

Closing Thoughts

Jesus invites us to experience His love and rest through spiritual habits—not as a burden, but as a pathway to relationship.

So take a moment to reflect:

• What are your spiritual habits producing?

• Are they leading you toward rest and relationship with Jesus?

• What small step can you take this week to align your habits with His purpose?

Let’s accept Jesus’ invitation to rest in Him this week.